FLOP GUN
Everyone remembers the bit from Pulp Fiction where brave hitmen Jules Winnfield and Vincent Vega emerge completely unscathed after being ambushed by a young gunman who had been hiding in the bathroom of an apartment they were picking up. That briefcase. Sprayed at close range with a hail of bullets from a ‘hand cannon’, our undeterred but somehow unscathed duo are left staring at themselves and each other in disbelief, before turning their own guns on their hapless would-be killer and blowing him up. Kingdom come. “We should be too [effin] Dead, man,” Jules muses, turning to look at the bullet holes in the wall behind him. “I know, we were lucky,” Vincent agrees, sparking a philosophical debate among colleagues about whether “what happened here” was luck or fate.
It’s a mystery that may have occupied the minds of Liverpool’s players as they returned to Merseyside on Sunday, where they were alive and well in the FA Cup and had secured their place in the fourth round despite coming under the heaviest fire lie from all possible sides, from a dizzying array of Gunners, but especially Kai Havertz. The unlucky would-be assassin was put in front by Mikel Arteta in his final attempt to solve his side’s poor finishing, leaving numerous bullet holes in the wall, only to see his team dismissed by a more ruthless Liverpool side who were virtually definitely won. It doesn’t matter whether their victory was due to luck or some kind of divine intervention. When push came to shove, it could be argued that ultimately it was Jurgen Klopp’s men who had the big kahunas.
“What I beg from the supporters is that they get behind the team,” Arteta pleaded after his side were booed following their third successive home defeat. “Stay behind the team, they are incredibly good. They deserve support with their attitude. I haven’t seen a team in the last six months that has generated what we have done [Liverpool].” He has a short memory as his own team have managed to score at least a goal against them in the last two weeks alone and will now spend some time off in Dubai figuring out how best to do more generate as they try to win the Premier. League and Grand Cup.
Liverpool’s win over Arsenal was the penultimate match in an FA Cup third round match that, despite the heroics of non-league Maidstone and Leeds striker Patrick ‘Bam-Bam’ Bamford, was hardly surprising. However, with just one game remaining, the prospect of defeat remains looming with Plucky Wigan hosting Manchester United at the DW Stadium this evening. The Latics are eighteenth in League One and are huge underdogs, but given the humiliations United have already suffered this season, a home win would be an entertaining, but hardly seismic, shock.
FRANZ BECKENBAUER (1945-2024)
Franz Beckenbauer, widely regarded as one of the greatest footballers of all time and one of only three men to win the World Cup as a player and manager, has died aged 78. Beckenbauer is an icon of German football and has won 104 caps for West. Germany, leading them to victory at the 1974 World Cup, before repeating the feat as manager in Italy 16 years later. He also won numerous other accolades, including a hat-trick of European Cups with Bayern Munich in the mid-1970s, when he also established his reputation as a defender of supreme talent. His family confirmed the news in a statement to the German news agency DPA. “It is with deep sadness that we announce that my husband and our father, Franz Beckenbauer, passed away peacefully in his sleep on Sunday, surrounded by his family,” the statement said. “We ask that we may grieve in silence and not be interrupted by questions.” RIP the Kaiser.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
“We can do fun activities, go out. A lot of guys bring their families out [to Dubai] also, so it’s a chance to meet people’s families. It’s nice to be in the heat, training in nice weather. It’s good for us” – After Arsenal’s 2-0 defeat to Liverpool, just as cauldrons across the country were reaching breaking point, Reiss Nelson took the opportunity to remind people around the world that not everyone is the same is rewarded for failures.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Scott Murray from 7.50pm GMT for exciting updates on the FA Cup Fourth Round draw, before minute-by-minute coverage of Wigan 1-3 Manchester United.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
I’m no expert on probability theory, but I believe it was the great Émile Borel who popularized the theorem that “if you were given an infinite number of Havertzs, an infinite number of balls and enough time, eventually one of them would stop taking too many touches and shooting before all opposing defenders have time to take cover again’. However, this is not that time” – Noble Francis.
If Ben Brereton Díaz knew everything about Sheffield United before his transfer, as their manager Chris Wilder claimed (Friday’s News, Bits and Bobs, full email edition), why on earth did he move there from Villarreal? – Mick Beeby.
Friday’s Football Daily quotes Sean Dyche, describing VAR’s decision to red card Dominic Calvert-Lewin for a stud making contact with Nathaniel Clyne, saying: ‘If you slow everything down you will find what you are looking for ‘ . If only someone had suggested that to Bono in 1986” – Ed Taylor.
Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter of the day is…Mick Beeby.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
This week the pod on Football Weekly talks about the plight of (poor) Jordan Henderson and whether Maidstone United are better than Arsenal.
ROAD TO WEMBLEY
We followed Sutton United into the third round, where the managerless League Two strugglers faced off against Plymouth, who were also managerless until they appointed Ian Foster as head coach just hours before the FA Cup tie. He started his tenure with a 3–1 win, but being a modest man he did not get all the credit for the victory. “I don’t think it was easy for the players to have a new head coach walk into the building as late as I did, and they responded well,” he calmed down. “I sent them a few messages this afternoon around the game, but Neil [Dewsnip] and Kevin (Nancekivell) prepared the team very well in my absence.” So now we follow the Pilgrims’ progress into the fourth round. We will find out later who they will meet in the raffle.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Tony Mowbray is Birmingham City’s thirteenth manager in thirteen years. “He is the right leader at the right time for our club,” snorted club suit Garry Cook.
Erik ten Hag believes (chuckles) that Manchester United (chuckles) are the best (crying) club in the world (please stop, no really) to play for – but only if you have the confidence to handle the pressure. “That always depends on those players and the confidence you have in your abilities,” roared the Dutchman.
Michail Antonio’s knee injury is getting worse. Oh no! West Ham may receive a loan as cover. Hurrah!
Kylian Mbappe’s Mr 15%s has dismissed reports that the PSG striker has agreed a move to Real Madrid, but insists talks have not even started yet. “No form of influence can dictate the timing of Kylian’s discussions, reflections or decisions,” a statement snapped.
In our European Championship overview, Ruben Loftus-Cheek, Dusan Vlahovic’s stoppage time winner and sixth division club Revel take on PSG in the French Cup.
And Dorival Júnior has resigned as head coach of São Paulo to take charge of Brazil’s national team. “It is the realization of a personal dream,” sobbed the 61-year-old.
DO YOU WANT MORE?
Our list of the 100 best female footballers in the world comes out this week. We’ve put together an incredible list of 112 judges, ranging from Champions League-winning coaches to former and current international players and coaches. From Barcelona head coach Jonatan Giráldez to Brazilian legend Sissi to presenter Lucy Ward, here’s a look at who put together our list.
Does reducing the size of a league help the teams and the level of football? Ligue 1 is a good case study and the answer seems yes, argues Eric Devin. And coincidentally, Sean Ingle has written his column about why overworked footballers deliver lower quality games and put themselves at risk.
Pasquale Mazzocchi waited his whole life to pull on the Napoli shirt, only to be sent off four minutes after his debut – a 3-0 defeat to Torino. Nicky Bandini examines the consequences of that red card and the latest Neapolitan defeat.
Suzanne Wrack had a chat with former Lioness Claire Rafferty about her ADHD and why the multi-functional sensory rooms at Wembley help her ‘feel normal’.
It’s Barney Ronay on Kai Havertz and a flailing Arsenal side.
Ten talking points – count them! – from last weekend’s FA Cup action.
With female footballers up to six times more likely than men to suffer the injury, Sam Kerr’s ACL injury is the latest blow in what is approaching an epidemic in women’s football, explains Sophie Downey.
Chances are you don’t know as much about Mário Zagallo as you should. Here is Samindra Kunti with his tribute to the four-time World Cup winner and the late great of the game.
Morocco are favorites to win Afcon – can they repeat their World Cup heroics? Yara El-Shaboury has the (few) answers. And Jonathan Wilson muses on whether an African country will win the World Cup in the next ten years (no).
MEMORY LONG
Spectators watch Everton take on Croydon in a Women’s Premier League match at Marine FC’s ground on College Road in Crosby in September 1998. Everton were the reigning champions, but lost their crown to their opponents that season. Fans didn’t have much to be excited about as the match ended 0-0.