Horror program. Nightmare. Saga of shame. Put out of their misery as India romped to a 3-1 series.
The verdict there, from the cricket commentary not on England’s current 3-1 defeat by India, sealed by a fine chase on the fourth day in Ranchi. But the verdict on the last time the England Test team went to India, won the first Test and then lost the next three on some poor pitches. At that point, the world looked ready to burn in March 2021, despite England having won the previous four series under Joe Root.
Related: Ben Stokes ‘incredibly proud’ of the team despite England’s defeat in India
Three years later we have essentially the same result. And of course it will be tempting to contrast the softer, more real assessment of England’s defeat with the same series score (with one still to be played).
Mention will be made, not least among bewildered followers of other Test nations, of the cult-like aspects of the Stokes Supremacy, the bubble talk about England’s attacking style extracting new levels of excellence from their opponents – for this There is no charge for service – and the feeling that no one here actually loses a game of cricket, that this is simply part of the overarching universal energy.
Moreover, there remains the undisputed new dictum that, for reasons that remain unclear, you cannot enjoy the positives of English aggressive cricket, as well as find things to improve upon when defeated. It is not clear why this should be the case. But it’s what people say. So it must be true.
Of course, this is all part of the fun of this England Test team. Has there ever been a more bizarrely polarizing tactical approach to this complex and dirty old sport?
A lot of the extreme devotional stuff has to do with the power of the personality. People love Ben Stokes, a great player who is charismatic, smart and friendly, in an arena where this is not always an essential part of the leadership culture.
In contrast, other countries will continue to find the latest incarnation of English exceptionalism reliably infuriating. We are England. And we are here to save Test cricket. In the meantime, and even if you’re defeated, we will fill this space, dominate this conversation, and make you say the word Bazball way more times than you want.
Hence the irritation on Indian cricket’s social media, aka Cry More Twitter, over the quibble over Stokes’ captaincy as Rohit Sharma leads his team to a 3-1 series lead with a depleted team. By the end of the match on the fourth day, there was already a lot of reaction to Stokes’ post-match comments.
These included praising his young spin bowlers (understandably they played well); mentioning the tough Indian conditions on day three (understandably they were tough); and how the series had also brought out the best of India’s young talent. Again this is probably true, but Ben Duckett has already confused the field at this point with his ‘we-taught-the-world-Bazball’ chat after the third Test.
In the middle of this, lost in the mist of post-truth Baz chat, it’s easy to lose sight of the only two questions worth asking as England taste their first series defeat to the Stokes -regime. The first is the usual one: is this team still improving and are adjustments needed?
England remain eighth in the World Test Championship rankings and would be fifth even with the 19 points set for slow overs. Stokes’ ultras will be a big part of the team’s excellent overall winning percentage, but this number also requires context. Teams outside the Big Three are now priced out of red-ball cricket. Zimbabwe used to be seriously good. England should really expect to suck up the minnows of the new world order.
Despite this, the current run has been a real step forward from the debacle of 2021. England were left out of the picture in the previous three defeats. Here they have won sessions and moments, enough to make even a 400-run defeat somehow feel like a good 400-run defeat. They lost in Ranchi mainly because of the period on day three where they lost seven for 35 and then saw India race to 40-0 in the fourth innings.
There was a reasonable chance on both sides to make it 2-2. Perhaps Jimmy Anderson could have opened the bowling for an off-spinner who had no experience with the new red ball at this level. But yeah. Can’t enjoy X. Then still criticize Y. This is what matters now.
In terms of the actual components of the team, the batting feels a bit vague among the openers. England have dropped just one batsman in the Baz era, Alex Lees, in keeping with the overall aim of generating confidence and an ultra-good atmosphere. Perhaps something has also changed in the way hitters are assessed and retained. The top six seem focused on delivering performance rather than maintaining averages.
Ollie Pope averaged 16 last year, outside of two big innings against Ireland and India, the latter being a sensational counterpunching match-winner. Jonny Bairstow has an average of 30 in that time, but is also seen as a match-winner, a moments man, a spirit animal.
This is probably necessary. There is too little time available to develop the kind of red-ball defensive play previously seen as a platform for a Test career. Dan Lawrence, the current backup, has spent the past six months playing for the Vipers, the Stars, the Gladiators and the Spirit, four franchises in three white-ball formats. It would be crazy to expect him to come in and play like Bill Athey now.
The bowling remains a mixture of old seamers and the increasing oddity of Ollie Robinson’s recent career, from 75mph no-balls in Ranchi to a final Test wicket in the slow-bouncer barrage at Lord’s in June. Matthew Potts certainly deserves a turn, although Robinson won’t be the first red-ball specialist to struggle with a lack of cricket as the Tests are pushed to the edge of the calendar.
This brings us to the second question worth asking about this England team. Does it fulfill the fundamental mission of securing its own future, of making Test cricket a product that people want a little more?
This was the key to the gloom of three years ago. Phrases like ‘extreme burnout’ were thrown around. Everyone looked exhausted and unhappy, the whole occasion overshadowed by decay.
Stokes’ reboot was intended as an answer to this existential question of making Test cricket something people wanted to play and watch. If the real question is, is this thing still good for Test cricket, then the answer has to be yes, even in defeat.
Given that the entire Stokes era is essentially a response to that end-of-year feeling of 2021, anything that makes a Test tour of India an event for both players and the home crowd has to be good. At that point, as we lower the Bazball mind filters again, England are still winning.